Author's Preface
Content Warning: This chapter contains references to sexual abuse, child abuse, pregnancy/infant loss, graphic violence, murder, and violence against a child.
Nimue walked through the palace halls. It was midday and everyone was hard at work. Everyone but her. She received the occasional curtsy and bow from the lowest staff, and despite her best efforts, it felt nice. The corner of her mouth quirked into a small smile as she offered each servant a courtly nod. She had truly come a long way.
And she still had a ways to go.
Without her lady and the young Princess, the palace was quite boring. She had nothing to do while they toured town, so she decided to pop down a fairly abandoned hall and take a smoke in one of the empty rooms the palace never seemed to use. All that space, all those people, and there still seemed to be corners others never saw.
Nimue walked on without thinking. She had memorized the route long ago. She was nearly to the end of a dark, dusty hall when she froze. A pair of lavender eyes met hers with unexpected heat. Jaziel stood before her, leaning against the door to the room she always used, his arms crossed over his chest.
“I think it’s time we had a chat,” he said. There was a smile on his face, but the atmosphere around him was anything but inviting. She had hated this child since he was a boy. He didn’t seem to have an honest bone in his body. He was a predator that wore lamb’s clothing. Much like someone else she once knew.
He stepped away from the door and opened it for her, tilting his head slightly toward the room. It seemed like an invitation, but Nimue knew better. A chill ran down her spine, but she wouldn’t allow him the satisfaction of seeing how anxious she was. She looked into the dim room and then back at the boy. Jamila’s precious brother and Shani’s loving uncle. She wanted to laugh at the thought.
If only they could see the way he stared at her.
She raised her chin and began to walk into the room. As she passed, she studied his never-changing face. He was an eerie child. But she knew everything about him. She had watched him grow up and change through the years. If anyone could handle this situation, it would be her. After all… If she could handle the king… She could handle this whelp.
She stepped inside. Jaziel followed and shut the door behind them.
Nimue and Jaziel stared each other down for several long moments, neither willing to look away. A storm still lingered in Jaziel’s lavender eyes, though his expression remained composed. Nimue regarded him with distaste, certain her own face was just as indifferent as his.
Jaziel watched her for a moment before letting out a long sigh. He leaned back against the door, crossing his foot over his ankle. His smile grew brighter now. Nimue could feel her frustration boiling beneath the surface. Cocky bastard. Was he just going to play cat and mouse all day? She had better things to do. And looking at his smile did not make the list.
She crossed her arms and glanced around the room. Jaziel studied her with a pleased gleam. The look only served to frustrate her more.
“Well?” she snapped, impatience slipping into her tone. “Can we get this over with? I have things to do.”
She glared at the young man. His jaw twitched at her comment. It was just a flash, but she knew he was irritated with the way she was talking to him. Good. If she could knock him slightly off-kilter, she might be able to buy time until Jamila and Shani returned. She could do that. The boy obviously was not a fan of her either.
“So you were the previous emperor’s mistress?” His tone remained level, almost conversational. A small, curious smile crossed his lips. Nimue twitched at the word. Mistress. She wanted to gag at the thought. Her eyes hardened as she dug her nails into her arms. Jaziel raised a brow at the response.
“Is that all this is about?” she scoffed. “What do you want… an apology for something I never wanted?”
Her voice cracked against her will. For a moment she was sure she saw something akin to pity in his eyes. But once more, any glimpse into him was quickly pulled under. If Jamila was the sun, Jaziel was the deepest ocean. Nimue could dive as deep as she liked, but he would sooner drown her than let her reach the bottom.
He took a breath, his face hardening into something much colder.
“I couldn’t care less about the circumstances,” he said quietly. Something bitter lingered in his voice.
“I was simply curious…” He pushed himself away from the door and approached her. His strides were heavy. He stopped a breath away from her. She had to look up to meet his gaze. He was truly too tall. Him and Jamila both.
“Why manipulate my sister?” His tone was dangerous. Icy. His eyes had gone cold, though something furious still burned beneath them. She finally understood.
This wasn’t about the history between her and the emperor. Not really. She was sure he wasn’t thrilled by what his oh-so-noble father had done to some lowly maid. No, he didn’t even seem to care too much about the death of her own son.
This was all about his darling goddess.
A laugh finally escaped her lips. Of course this was about Jamila. He never seemed to so much as lift a finger unless it revolved around his precious sister. She had truly picked the correct twin to support. A dog could only be as wild as its chain allowed, after all.
She could use this. Twist it.
“Manipulate? Me?” she echoed his words back, tilting her head slightly with feigned confusion. A faint smile touched the corners of Jaziel’s lips at the act.
“Oh… you mean Jamila’s ascension.” Her eyes widened slightly as though understanding had only just dawned on her. She tapped a finger against her lip. Amusement flickered in his eyes. The look confused her profoundly. Then her expression turned to ice.
“I hate to disappoint you… but that was entirely your sister’s doing.” Her tone was matter-of-fact. It wasn’t necessarily a lie. Nimue had suggested it and helped the whole thing progress smoothly while Jaziel was away, but Jamila would have done anything for her child. At the end of the day, Jamila was the one who followed through.
Jaziel sighed softly and shook his head in disappointment. Confusion crossed her features. That wasn’t what she was expecting. Then her eyes widened as he grabbed her face.
“You really insist on making this difficult.” Panic swelled in her. She tried to pull away, but Jaziel’s grip was as firm as iron. She gritted her teeth and glared up into his eyes, only to freeze at what she saw. Bored. He seemed completely bored.
“I have no mercy for liars,” Jaziel said. His face remained emotionless. His grip tightened. Her jaw screamed in protest as tears pricked at the corners of her eyes.
“Now…” he continued calmly, his expression unchanged, “shall we try this one more time?”
Jaziel loosened his grip on her. As soon as he did, Nimue swatted his hand away. He didn’t so much as flinch at the impact. He simply watched her, his eyes dull. She worked her jaw before shooting him a glare. She was right to torment this brat. He was just like him.
“Yes,” she rasped. “I did everything I could to place Jamila on that throne.”
“Why her?” Jaziel asked, tilting his head slightly. “If power was your goal… I would have been the more logical choice.”
Nimue laughed at the word. Logical. As if one choice was always the correct one. She glanced around the room. It was dim, with only a few candelabras on the walls and crates stacked in the corners. Jaziel stood much too close for her to even try reaching the door directly behind him. She had thought he was still a cub… turns out he had grown teeth.
Still, she refused to give this predator the satisfaction of seeing her fear.
Jaziel’s form blurred, replaced by a man with an eerily similar build and facial structure. Golden hair the color of wheat replaced Jaziel’s white locks. He was as beautiful as an angel. It was unfortunate he was something much darker than that. Tears streamed down her cheeks as hatred raged in her chest.
“I chose her because she was a woman,” Nimue said. Jaziel said nothing in response. He looked to be waiting for something. But she could barely see him through the cloud of his father. Her jaw tightened.
“And because she trusted me, she listened to me!” she admitted at last. The truth settled heavily in her chest. Still Cyrus said nothing. He just gazed at her the way he had done in the past. Complete and utter disregard.
“I would never allow another monster to sit on that throne,” she continued, her voice sharpening as her gaze locked onto him. “Not after you… Your father.”
Jaziel’s jaw twitched. The first crack in his composure in a while. Relief swelled over her as she heard a quiet hum of the gates opening. It was barely audible, but she knew they were back. She only had to hold on a little longer and she was sure Shani’s monstrous ears would hear them.
He would never risk destroying the carefully crafted image of the sweet, devoted uncle. Not after he’d spent so much time perfecting it. He was too much of a perfectionist… just like Cyrus.
“I am nothing like my father,” Jaziel said. His tone remained calm, but beneath it she caught the faintest tremor of frustration. A small smile touched Nimue’s lips.
“You’re right,” she said softly.
“Your father was at least honest about the kind of monster he was.” Jaziel did not so much as flinch, so she continued. Her eyes hardened. She tried to brush the overlapping image away, but it refused to budge. Not that it mattered much. Sons took after their fathers, after all.
“This kingdom has no need for someone like you.”
Jaziel’s expression remained perfectly still. But his eyes softened, turning slightly glossy. He looked like a wounded animal. Just like the boy she had tormented throughout his childhood. The one boy of the imperial bloodline she could hurt.
And against her better judgment, her lips loosened. A shaky smile found its way to her face.
“If I had my way,” Nimue hissed, “I would have had Jamila slit your throat while you slept.”
The moment the words left her mouth, her eyes widened. Her hands flew to cover it. She shouldn’t have said that. She was never meant to say that. She looked toward him. His eyes had darkened.
Something inside him snapped. For one terrible moment, the world went red. He had no idea what had happened or how much time had passed. When he came to, his ears rang and the metallic scent of blood filled the room. He knew that scent all too well.
But why was it here? He was in the palace, not on the battlefield.
His hand shook around a bloodied dagger he could have sworn was still holstered at his thigh. Confusion enveloped him, and then he heard the sound of struggling, wet gasps.
He looked ahead to see Nimue on her knees. Blood spilled between her fingers as she clutched at her throat. Choking sounds escaped her lips as she opened and closed her mouth soundlessly, her face far paler than he remembered. Her eyes were wide with fear.
It was the first time he had ever seen her so scared. And it wasn’t just anyone she feared. She was looking at him. His eyes widened in surprise as the pieces of his memory finally began to tumble into place. He couldn’t help the small, ironic laugh that escaped him.
“Jam slit my throat?” he said. Amusement flickered through him at the thought. “Looks like you were looking at your own future instead.”
He frowned slightly as he watched the blood slowly stain the front of her uniform. As he took in the sight, something almost pitying entered his gaze.
“I’m sorry he hurt you… but you shouldn’t have hurt me either.” He wiped a stray drop of blood from her cheek. Her hands began to slacken as her eyes rolled back. He watched as she collapsed to the floor with a heavy thud.
Blood spread quickly across the dark stone. Her eyes remained frozen in fear. Jaziel’s mouth formed a thin line. Gently, he closed her eyes. A thick silence followed. Jaziel stood with a sigh and stretched. His body felt both tight and relaxed for some reason.
He pitied her, but there was a weight lifted from his shoulders he couldn’t explain. Not that it mattered anymore. He began contemplating what to do with her body when he heard it. Soft footsteps approaching the room.
His gaze snapped toward the door. He moved instantly, slipping beside it so that when it opened, he would be almost completely hidden, the dagger still clutched in his hand. He couldn’t afford another witness.
The door creaked open slowly. He raised the blade, only to freeze as a young girl with pink-tinted silver hair entered the room. His eyes widened.
“Nimue…?” Shani whispered. Her whole body trembled as she took in the sight. The light from the door illuminated a straight path to the older woman’s corpse.
She stumbled into the room on shaking legs. Her face looked paler than when she left, tear trails staining her small cheeks. She had been crying long before she entered the room. Jaziel’s hand trembled. He inhaled slowly. He let go of the knife and reached for the door, shutting it once more.
He saw her flinch at the sudden sound. Her body became rigid. But he didn’t delay. He reached out, pulling Shani against his chest. He covered her mouth and nose.
Shani struggled and kicked against him. A muffled scream escaped her as she clawed at his leather-bound wrists. His heart hurt, but he refused to let her go. If she realized it was him… he didn’t want to think about what he would have to do.
She fought against him for a few moments more, her movements reminding him of a feral kitten. Then she grew weaker before going limp in his arms. He let out a shaky breath, holding her there a moment longer before carefully lowering her to the floor.
His trembling fingers pressed lightly against her neck. She still had a pulse. He collapsed with relief as he ran a hand through his white hair.
“Sorry you had to see this, princess…” he said gently. He reached toward her head, only to freeze at the sight of her bloodied forehead. His heart dropped.
“Princess… who hurt you?” he asked as he followed the bloodied curl. He frowned. The trip to town must have not gone well. He needed to check on his sister.
Then his gaze lifted once more toward the room. It was an utter mess. A faint, exhausted smile crossed his face. It had been a long day. And his list of to-dos seemed to keep growing.
Jaziel stood and rolled up his sleeves, stretching his neck before turning his attention back to the scene.
“Well…” he murmured softly.
“Better clean the mess first.”
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