Nostalgia

After Mohinder had hung up on Rachel—the rest of the drive was incredibly quiet.

Eventually, Octavia pulled her car into the isolated parking lot of a storage facility on the outskirts of town, surrounded only by expanses of trees and a single chain-linked fence. She cruised slowly in between two gray storage buildings, slowing to a stop in front of the blue garage door of unit 13.

She put her car in park, peered out at her storage unit for a second, then turned to Mohinder, who was leaned far back in the seat now, his eyes closed.

“Hey!” Octavia shouted, reaching over and slapping him once hard on the chest.

Mohinder grunted and sat bolt upright, huffing out a breath and glaring at her. “What…?!”

“Stop trying to fall asleep,” Octavia ordered.

Mohinder almost replied, but he fell silent and sighed, nodding and running a hand down his face. “Right…”

They were both quiet for a second. Octavia took her phone from his lap, snapped it into the mounted stand on her dash, and faced him again, thinking of his Sedan back at the apartment complex. The two of them had decided not to drive separately back to Eli’s house with all of the packed goods just yet, because Mohinder was worried that he would sit down and fall asleep if he was left alone in the house after packing. He wanted to be with someone right now, just to ensure he wouldn’t have the chance to accidentally slip into a nap with a concussion.

“Hey. I can call an Uber out to the apartments after we get back to Eli’s,” Octavia offered. “I can just go grab your car for you, if you want… and if you can be trusted not to sleep for that whole fifteen minutes I’m gone.”

Mohinder flashed a half-smile, managing a few tired chuckles. “I think I can survive that. Thank you.”

Octavia smirked as well, patting him once on the arm before popping her door open and stepping out. She knelt in front of the blue garage door, inserted a key from her ring into the lock, then unlatched and removed it, whipping the door up as she stood—and it shot upright and opened loudly.

As sunlight washed into the narrow rectangular room inside—Mohinder leaned slightly forward in the passenger seat, gazing out the driver door’s window and narrowing his eyes slightly, examining what he could see of the inside of her storage unit.

To the left were stacks of boxes, but farther back were a wider variety of things—totes, military duffle bags, an opossum trap, and a few tall black cases that looked like they contained rifles.

Mohinder’s eyes narrowed even more, fingers coiling around the door handle and pulling it. He climbed out of the car and marched around it, approaching the open storage unit and gathering a better look of it, feeling a bit vexed at the sight. He was able to see a few smaller black gun cases sitting on top of the plastic grays totes now, and to the right was a long line of random objects that he couldn’t name if he tried.

“Ah…” he uttered, looking around and scratching his cheek. “You, um… you’re not an assassin, are you?”

Octavia was digging through a tote, pulling out one of her many zip-lock bags of seeds, this one marked with sharpie letters that read Bamboo . She turned her head and stared at him, smiling and shaking her head.

“No. I’m a doomsday-prepper,” she told him, pocketing the bag of seeds and rifling through the tote again. “I just never really brought it up to you guys, because I figured you’d think I was crazy… but… after the day we’ve had, and after last night… that is seriously the last thing I care about right now…”

Mohinder made a nod, pocketing his hands and giving the storage unit another once-over before looking to her again.

“You did this in high school too…?” he asked.

“Well… not to this extent , but… yeah,” Octavia answered. “Man, there was no way in hell I’d talk about it back then. Now, I just couldn’t care less what anyone thinks… thank God…”

Mohinder made a thoughtful face, biting his lip for a moment and shrugging. “Well… it’s sensible, honestly. I might’ve thought it was a bit paranoid twenty years ago… but now? Now, I think it’s almost irresponsible not to be prepared.”

Octavia paused, turning away from the tote and eyeing him curiously. “Really…?”

“Oh… absolutely,” Mohinder agreed. “I mean, it’s not as if I’m particularly skilled at doing that myself, but… if I had the room, or the extra money, or the means… then I might set some preparations aside. The way the world is now… you really never know what will happen. It just makes sense to do.”

Octavia stared at him for a moment, feeling a bit surprised by his statement. For so many years, she’d felt certain that Mohinder would find her doomsday-prepping to be excessive or even crazy, but it seemed she was entirely wrong. She felt a touch of relief at this, though she wasn’t quite sure why.

“Huh,” she muttered, looking down into her tote again.

Her eyes landed on a large, metal toolbox at the bottom of it, which was precisely what she was looking for—as it contained everything she needed for removing flock cameras from the streets under the cover of night.

Now, however, as she found herself gazing down at it, she felt more hesitant to take on that task than she did the last time she’d done it. An anxious knot began forming in the pit of her stomach the longer she stared at it, and she couldn’t shake the hesitation she felt about doing such a thing again.

When she glanced over at Mohinder, she instantly knew why.

Before Octavia had reunited with her friends, she honestly did not care what might happen to her during her riskier activities—but now, she felt a sense of guilt. Mohinder, Eli, Samuel, and Hailey wouldn’t be happy if she got herself arrested, and neither would Mrs. Riley. It would hurt and upset all of them.

“Damn…” Octavia sighed, pulling out her phone and opening the ShadowSay app, the app she used to communicate with the other members of the ETC completely anonymously.

She opened her messages and prepared to send one to Steve, but then she paused, squinting down at her phone and seeing that he’d already messaged her first—and about the very same topic she’d wanted to discuss.

Steve’s message read;

Hey… I don’t know if you saw it posted this morning, but they put up more flock cameras. I downloaded your how-to and me and my friend are gonna go take care of some tonight. Wanna join us?

Octavia stared at this message for a few seconds, then glimpsed over at Mohinder again, sighing and typing out her response.

Her message stated;

I wish I could, but I’m doing a similar task elsewhere tonight. Good luck, and don’t get caught.

At that, she stuffed the phone into her pocket and decided that simply spreading the bamboo seeds was more than enough for one night, standing and marching outside again as another surge of relief coursed through her. She was glad for those friends she’d made on that website; now, some of those people were beginning to take things on all on their own, and she didn’t feel pressured to do it all herself anymore.

Then, out of nowhere, she got the impulsive notion to mention it to Mohinder—and she wheeled around on her heel, meeting his eyes and smirking at him.

“Hey. Random question,” Octavia said. “Would you think I was a bad person if I went around tearing down flock cameras at night time?”

Mohinder stared blankly at her, slowly opening his mouth and making a strange face. “You’re not making me an accessory to something, are you…?”

Octavia laughed. “No.”

Mohinder squinted oddly at her, then chuckled. “Well… no. I wouldn’t think you’re a bad person. I’d think you’re an incredibly reckless one.”

Octavia’s smile grew. “Well. That’s fair.”

“I don’t particularly understand why the whole flock cameras issue is political to anyone, honestly,” Mohinder said as the two of them strolled back to the car. “To me, it’s just an issue because it’s invasive and draconian. Doesn’t matter about democrats or republicans. Doesn’t matter whose side you’re on. That’s really got nothing to do with it. It just sets a bad precedent in society. Why would they want to normalize something that’s so dystopian and ripe for abuse? Honestly…”

“Wooow… and that’s an Englishman saying that,” Octavia snickered, swatting him on the arm.

Mohinder turned and gave her a flattened sort of smile. “I am an American citizen, thank you very much.”

“Oh, I know. I know you’re American now … but you still have plenty of English all over you, especially hiding in your soft little accent,” Octavia teased, poking him in the side. “And if you’re saying the flock cameras are too dystopian… then holy crap , man. There’s no argument anymore.”

The two of them climbed into the car—and Octavia drove off to Eli’s home, deciding to use his debit card online rather than at the stores today. She could do her prepping from home after she got Mohinder and his car both back to the house.

So—the next couple of hours played out just as she’d planned. She drove Mohinder back to the house, called an Uber to the apartment complex, and drove his old Sedan to the house as well. She walked down to the basement and tossed his keys to him when she returned, plopping down on the couch beside him and opening her laptop, MiMi leaping up onto the cushions and snuggling alongside her.

The afternoon set in, and no one else was home yet, aside from Gloria Riley, who had insisted that she could prepare dinner without any help. So—Octavia and Mohinder sat alone with MiMi in the hangout basement, Mohinder surfing through the streaming services on the TV while Octavia shopped online. The sunlight just barely bled into the room from between the drawn drapes with an orange, comforting glow that shone over the wood-paneled wall, creating a homey, serene sort of ambiance that reminded Octavia of just how these afternoons were twenty years ago, how the dim shine of sunset would peer into their homes late after school, when the day was winding down, and when all of them were together.

She smiled as she clicked around on her laptop, feeling both comfortable and lucky as this nostalgic sensation sank into her. Most people never got to relive those lost, warm memories of their lives of long ago, and she knew she was quite blessed to have that feeling back in hers.

“Well… I cannot seem choose what to watch,” Mohinder sighed, lowering the remote. “Suppose I should be unpacking my things, but I very much do not want to right now…”

He paused, peeking over at Octavia’s laptop and seeing that she was on a website with a long list of things for sale—large or expensive things, like backup generators, water purification systems, chicken coops, fencing, and more.

“What on earth are you planning?” Mohinder chuckled.

Octavia glanced at him and shrugged, scooting a little closer to him and showing it to him properly. “I’m filling up a cart for Eli. I’m gonna have him look at it and give it a final approval before I actually buy anything, though.”

“Huh. Okay. Then what on earth is he planning?” Mohinder asked with another laugh.

“Well… he’s kind of a doomsday-prepper too,” Octavia smirked. “Or he wants to be, anyway. He asked me to be his… I don’t know… what do you call someone who deals with something completely for you and makes all the decisions about it for you?”

Mohinder made a thoughtful face, scratching gently against the gauze pad on the side of his forehead. “A manager…?”

“Okay, then yeah… he made me his prepping manager,” Octavia disclosed, smiling even wider and feeling honestly delighted to be talking to Mohinder about this, something she never thought she’d be able to comfortably do. “Oh my God… do you know how cool it is to be talking to you about this?”

Mohinder raised his eyebrows. “Ah… no. But I don’t remember us talking at great length about anything other than… well… nonsense.”

“I knooow,” Octavia beamed, sinking deeper into the couch cushions and repeatedly smacking his arm. “But I’m so happy. I can finally be myself around you.”

“Why did you think you couldn’t do that before?” Mohinder asked genuinely.

Octavia hesitated for a second, gazing forward and sighing.

“Honestly,” she muttered. “I was afraid you wouldn’t wanna be friends anymore.”

Mohinder stared at her, looking down and gnawing his bottom lip for a moment.

Octavia felt a spark of anxiety at the brief silence in the air, a feeling that she hadn’t had since high school, and she’d truly thought it was gone from her by now. She stole a glimpse of him, trying to read his expression, but he simply looked reflective now, as if he was trying to remember how he was back then.

“Well…” Mohinder uttered, nodding sideways. “I could see how I might’ve come off that way. I was a bit more pretentious at that time… although, admittedly, being around you all helped to make that go away. I can’t remember if…”

His brow wrinkled, and he turned a little more toward her.

“Can I ask you something?” Mohinder said. “Just… personally, and from your own point of view… was I a good friend at all?”

Octavia gave him a long, profound stare, her heart fluttering, and she took in a heavy cloud of breath. Suddenly, countless things wanted to escape her, and gazing into his eyes, shiny, dark, and rife with kindness, she felt almost lost in them, just as she had long ago. Truly and deeply to her core, she loved and adored him back then, and she felt exactly the same now. She loved how kind he was, how loyal he was, and how he always simply defaulted to that loyalty and compassion no matter what was going on. She cherished that, and she often felt so lost and alone in a world where almost nobody else was the kind of pure, kind, and compassionate that Mohinder Talavar was. She herself felt a powerful need to be that loyal and caring in her own life—and he was the only person she’d ever known to fully and outstandingly match it, just by being him.

As it all swam through her thoughts, she swallowed, looking down at her lap and beginning to suspect that she was probably not the right person to answer this question. Out of all of the misfits five—she was undoubtedly the most biased.

Still, she tried to manufacture an answer regardless, hoping to word it in a way that wasn’t quite as hard-hitting and over the top as her actual feelings on the matter.

“You always have been,” Octavia said softly, wearing a warm, contented smile. “And… I am definitely not just saying that to make you feel better. I really… honestly… just love your personality. I did then, and I do now. I think you just kick yourself too much when things don’t go right… like with Sam, and the addiction thing… or… whatever else…”

“You,” Mohinder said solemnly.

Octavia blinked, adjusting her head on the cushion and squinting at him. “What?”

“Well, things didn’t… entirely… go right with you , either,” Mohinder told her.

Octavia stared at him, now confused.

Mohinder let out a breath and crossed his arms, leaning sideways against the back cushion, fully facing her.

“I know it’s kind of normal to lose touch with people after high school… but I… wish I hadn’t,” he conceded. “Namely with… you. I always regretted that…”

Octavia swallowed, feeling a slow rise of emotions begin to well up inside. She’d spent so long pushing this thought to the back of her mind, avoiding it, feeling hurt by it, thinking that her friends simply forgot about her—and now, after two decades, she was finally hearing something to the contrary from the person she most wanted to.

“God… I just didn’t think of it back then,” Mohinder sighed. “So much was going on, and it was… Hell…”

Octavia felt a stab of guilt all the sudden, thinking of what he had told her earlier in the day, and the godawful trauma that he’d endured so soon after high school—and now, she felt like the most selfish person in the world, moping and lamenting the fact that he had stopped contacting her, all while he was going through the worst part of his life.

“I’m so sorry,” she murmured thoughtlessly.

Mohinder shook his head once, eyeing her questioningly.

“I really thought you just didn’t care this whole time,” Octavia said sadly. “I had no idea what you were going through…”

“Oh… don’t… don’t apologize for that,” Mohinder said with a breathless little laugh, placing his hand atop hers and giving it a shake. “It was all forever ago. And we’re here now.”

Octavia cracked a smile, his hand lingering on hers, so warm, inviting, comforting…

Her eyes wandered down to his hand, then back up to his cute, handsome face, feeling as if she never wanted him to let go of her, never wanted him to stop gingerly stroking along her knuckles the way he was now. The two of them felt just as comfortable with closeness and touch as they had all those years ago—in fact, that was a trait shared among all five of them. They all hugged, wrestled, smacked, play-fought, sat squished together on couches or in cars, and even fell asleep snuggled closely in the same beds or on the same air mattresses at times. None of them were ever anxious, uneasy, or uncomfortable with being close to each other at all. It was simply normal for them to be close, and they felt very much at home doing so.

Yet, still—as Octavia quietly cherished the simple touch of Mohinder’s hand—she felt electricity inside, an intense, impassioned longing, and she knew without a doubt that this sensation was more than just the usual platonic comfort that she’d always felt being close with all of her friends. With Mohinder, it was so much deeper, and so much more.

“And you…” he leaned slightly closer, gripping her hand a little tighter. “God, you have made this day so much easier to get through. You have no idea.”

Octavia’s smile widened.

“Can we be each other’s comfort person…?” she asked lightly.

Mohinder tilted his head at her. “What does that mean?”

“Like, just…” Octavia scooted closer, leaning over and resting snugly against him. “Just… like this… being a comfort…”

Mohinder smirked, nodding and adjusting in his seat again, pressing his back to the couch and allowing her to sit slumped over against him, and he sat slacked back a little crooked, leaning into her as well. He raised the remote to the TV again, and she quietly returned to her online shopping on her laptop, both of them basking in the glow of the late-day sun in peace.