Author's Preface
Saturday, 7 April 1894
Sister Grace is gone. No warning. She left on the train yesterday. I heard her and Sister Mary Maxwell shouting about something in the morning, then Sister Grace packed her bags and rushed off. She barely had any time to say goodbye.
Sister Grace should have fought back against Sister Mary Maxwell more. She shouldn't have given up and left. She was the only one who cared about Ryn and me and didn't just see us as a burden. Why did you abandon us, Sister Grace? Do you not care about us anymore? Did I do something wrong?
Was it because I didn't go to class that day last month? You told me I didn't have to. I was only doing what you told me. I thought you were trying to help me. Why do you hate me now Sister Grace?
Wednesday, 11 April 1894
I'm sorry Sister Grace. I know you don't hate me. You didn't want to leave us, it was all Sister Mary Maxwell's fault. Bad things kept happening when you were around and I got angry at you. I don't know why I would get angry. I know none of it was your fault. I guess that can't happen anymore now that you're gone. Unless you come back. I promise not to get angry at you for things you didn't do if you come back.
Did you know Sister Mary Maxwell is sick today? Of course not, how would you know? You're not here anymore. I will do my best to keep writing Sister Grace, even though you're gone. I know it's what you would want me to do because you always told me how much it helps you. I don't know why I'm writing this to Sister Grace. She's never going to be reading this.
I still don't understand how writing about bad things is supposed to help. Writing about good things would be nice so I could remember them better but not enough good things happen for me to write about.
I'm happy Sister Mary Maxwell is sick, it serves her right. The other Sisters aren't any better though, so it doesn't help. John pushed Ryn into Lizzie, and then Sister Sarah yelled at Ryn for it! I tried to tell her it was John but then she just yelled at me and made me work in the kitchen.
She meant it as a punishment but I didn't mind. Cutting up potatoes and onions is boring but at least it is quiet in the kitchen. And warm. It's been really cold this week.