I thought I was just trapped in a bad dream. I thought someone would wake me up from this nightmare and tell me that my father was still alive.
Just last night, I was talking to him. Not even a full day had passed, and now he was gone. And I knew he wasn't coming back.
It feels like only yesterday when we came here to visit my brother. But now, we're here for Dad.
Not long ago, we only visited my brother. Now, we have another reason to come to this sorrowful place.
The deafening silence here makes my heart ache.
As long as I can see his grave, I want to ask God why this is happening to us—especially to my mother.
It hurts when your loved ones die, but it hurts even more when you see the people you love suffering and crying for someone they love. It's torture. I don't know how to ease their pain because I'm hurting too.
"W-why did you have to leave me, Ricardo? We promised each other we'd never be separated. You promised you wouldn't leave me, so why are you there? Why are you giving me another reason to be even sadder?"
"What did I do wrong to deserve this punishment? You've already forgiven me, haven't you? Then why did you still do this to me?"
"I love you so much, Ricardo. I can't live without you. It's only been a few days since I've been apart from you, and I'm already losing my mind. How am I supposed to endure a lifetime without you? Please come back to me... or take me with you... I'll follow..."
All I could hear was her agony.
Mourning is inevitable when the people you least expect—the people you love the most—die.
Even now, I still can't believe Dad is gone.
Of all people, why him?
I want to dig up his grave. I want to wake him from his peaceful sleep. I want to ask him why he let go so soon.
We still had so many cases to solve.
I promised myself I would make him proud, but how can he see my success if he's no longer here?
I still have so many questions to ask him.
He still has so many answers to give me.
There is still so much I need to learn from him.
So why did he leave so early?
Tell me... was this really the right time for him?
Days passed, and all the color disappeared from our house. There was no reason to be happy anymore.
I had countless questions, but I chose to remain silent and stop searching for answers.
Maybe some questions are destined to remain unanswered because the person who knows the answer can no longer respond.
"Aedrian, come eat."
I didn't bother answering.
I didn't even have the strength to speak.
Now I finally understand what it feels like to lose someone you love.
This must be how my seatmate felt.
Now we're the same.
"Come on, Aedrian. Let's eat."
She held my hand, still trying to pull me up from my chair.
"I have no reason to eat... Why should I eat if I'm going to die anyway?"
I looked at her and saw her bite her lower lip.
Whenever I looked at her, I felt like she pitied me.
And I hated that feeling.
"People don't live on food alone, but food gives you the strength to live. You have a lot of reasons to keep living, Aedrian. You just need to think about them.
"There are so many reasons to eat. We eat to become stronger. When we're strong enough, we can get through another day. Days that make us wonder why we choose to be sad when we could choose to be happy.
"That's what I've realized. Everyone dies. All people have their own death waiting for them, so they live as if they might die tonight.
"Why don't you just move on and accept the fact that some people will leave and some people may come into your life?"
I looked out the window, trying to convince myself that she was right.
"Why am I here in this world, Nica? Is it to live or to die?"
"To love, Aedrian. To love."
I was already outside the school when I heard the loud horn of a vehicle.
No, it wasn't just any vehicle—it was a patrol car.
Why was someone honking at me like that?
I noticed my fellow students staring at me, their attention caught by the patrol car as well.
The window rolled down, and I saw someone who looked familiar.
"Jump in!" he said with a smile.
"I'm with my bicycle," I replied.
I mean, how was I supposed to get in?
Besides, even if he looked familiar, he was still a stranger. For all I knew, this police officer could be planning something.
He scratched his head and got out of the vehicle.
I got off my bicycle too.
"I'm Leo San Jose, your father's partner in solving crimes. I thought you might need to know something. So, would you come with me to the station?"
Then I remembered him. He was the officer I had asked to contact the fast-food supervisor during Marco's case.
I didn't know exactly what he wanted me to know, but I let him place my bicycle in the patrol car's storage compartment.
Then I got into the vehicle and accompanied him to the police station.
"This is a copy of the CCTV footage showing your father and Ronaldo meeting."
His first statement immediately made me think.
Did Ronaldo kill my father?
Wait... why was this only occurring to me now?
My mind had been so consumed by Dad's death that I hadn't even considered these questions.
He played the footage for me.
9:45 p.m. — the time I saw my father head to the city jail.
9:50 p.m. — the moment he finally met Ronaldo in the visiting room.
Why would my father visit a hostage-taker?
I knew they were friends, but why visit him that late at night?
Then I saw someone enter the other side of the room where Dad was.
A man wearing a white long-sleeved shirt and black pants.
I couldn't see his face because only his back was visible.
Then he pulled a gun from his side.