"You don't hear that?" Sean asked quietly. "From downstairs…"
Emma listened for a moment, then replied, "Oh yeah," and went back to scrolling.
"How is this your only reaction?" he retorted, and she just shrugged. He added, "What's that language anyway? German? Swiss?"
"I don't think there's a 'Swiss' language…" she commented, and it kind of made sense to Sean. She speculated after a moment, "Maybe Swedish?"
He kept listening in – they seemed to be arguing about something. Three or four distinct voices. He asked, "What makes you say it's Swedish? It sounds more like…" He trailed off – he had no idea.
Emma gave him a tired look, then teased, "You've never been to Ikea?" This time he shrugged, so she just shook her head and focused on her phone again – barely muttering: "Whatever."
"Why? Do they speak Swedish in the stores?" he questioned… uncertain whether they actually did that.
"How about you go down there and ask them," Emma suggested.
"What, ask some foreigners if they're from Ikea?" he mocked.
"Uh-huh," she replied.
He exhaled tiredly… Then again, there was only one way to find out – and they couldn't keep hiding upstairs forever. He asked Emma before he left, "Wanna bet?"
She merely said, "Sure, whatever."
He took it at face value and headed back downstairs. The courtyard door was closed, no nasty monsters in sight, so he turned into the hallway leading to the entrance. Once he got to the main chamber, he counted five guys: two arguing vigorously in their language, two more holding the door… and one meditating with his hand over the hinges.
Sean stared at this with wide eyes and exclaimed, "Holy shit – you are from Ikea!"
They all looked at him… with mostly concerned expressions. He also noticed a bunch of Gremlin corpses piled in a corner – Sean wasn't sure, but they seemed like the seven he had killed in the alley with Emma. The two who had been conversing approached him warily: a blond in caster robes, and a brown-haired guy in heavy armor and holding a simple triangular shield. Sean had no idea what class specifically, obviously some melee, possibly Tank – and it wasn't starter gear either. Two other men wore cloth robes and the fifth guy was in leather armor. The three resumed working on the door, though they kept glancing at him.
The blond asked in accented English – but easily understandable: "And why do you say that?"
"Well, the cleanup and– Wait, what's going on?" Sean was extra-confused. He had thought he knew a thing or two about how this world worked… and now this!
The two glanced at each other. The tank complained about something in Swiss… or more likely Swedish.
"I'm sorry, I don't speak– Is that Swedish, or German, or…" Sean asked, but trailed off before mentioning the Swiss language .
"Ya-ya, sehr Deutsch. Groß German!" the tank said – the tone alone gave away that he wasn't serious.
"Excuse my friend please, he's not speaking… a very good English," the blond explained.
"Ya, sehr German, very Deutschland!" the tank seemed to insist .
They exchanged a few quick sentences in another language, presumably Swedish, then the blond turned to Sean: "Can you hide the weapons – or is this a threat?"
Sean only then remembered that he still carried both axes in his hands. He felt stupid about this, so he bluffed, "I'd rather not, actually. You should know there's a bunch of Gremlins out the back – some kind of courtyard, I think?"
"We know. That's why we are here," the guy remarked. "What are you here for?"
"Well, the Gremlin event… or quest, I guess?" Sean admitted, then asked in turn: "But what are you doing with the door, and why bring all the corpses inside?"
The Swede simply pressed, "How did you get the quest? Did you kill all those Gremlins outside?"
"Sure, but why did you bring them indoors?" Sean repeated his question.
"Do you want a queue for this place too?" the blond guy countered.
"Go away!" the tank barked, and the two exchanged a few muffled sentences in Swedish. The three guys had fixed the door in the meantime and now watched them.
Sean realized what was going on: a secret location to grind Gremlins – while quest candles guided everybody else to the queues. Clever. He wondered why nobody else had found this place, then figured that it was in a rather obscure alley – and he had only heard the noises from indoors with his enhanced senses. He had also snuck up on the two Gremlins in the alley – their first instinct was to flee, so if the creatures had run away from players… others might've walked past without ever noticing. Or just patiently waited in line! The best way to farm this event – at least according to that queued Paladin.
He also noticed the other three had discreetly grabbed their weapons… as if preparing for a fight. Would player combat in this abandoned neighborhood attract guards? Sean had no idea how PVP worked inside the city – and he would prefer not to find out first-hand, so he bluffed, "Whoa, guys… there's nothing wrong with overleveling!"
"And what level are you?" the blond asked, taking a couple of steps back. The tank moved to block the path.
With the door now fixed and closed, would anybody even hear the fighting? Sean shrugged. PVP wasn't his idea of a pastime, so he continued his bluff: "Oh, who's counting… but enough to take care of these Gremlins outside – as you must've seen."
The tank tensed and looked back at his group. Two more guys had blond hair, but one concealed by a hood and the other under a leather cap. The last dark-haired young man was either from another country, or just had a tan. Sean gripped his axes. He had no idea if his weapons would be of any use against a seemingly well-organized team, but he was determined to give them hell – should the worst come to the worst.
The blond guy near him warned, "No way you can take on all of us, no matter how–"
"But I wasn't planning to!" Sean interrupted, then concluded that if they attacked – the odds of his victory would be very slim. So he casually secured the axes to his waist. The group seemed to relax slightly upon seeing this… but didn't lower their guard.
"Will you leave then?" somebody asked from the back, with a heavy accent.
Sean tried to speak confidently: "It's a free country – if you don't like it, then maybe you can go somewhere else." They exchanged nervous glances, but didn't attack. It finally occurred to him that he hadn't heard many foreigners in Lobehelm before – just an outlier or two. He tried, "But what are you doing here? I thought Erea was for English speakers – or this part of it, anyway…"
The tank muttered something in Swedish under his breath. Sean only caught: "…typisk amerikansk…" – but the whole remark did not seem friendly, and Sean worried that he might've pushed it too far.
The blond countered, " Lob-Helm is just one starter town… and it's a free country." The guy seemed to be their leader, or at least the designated speaker.
"Now you're talking my language!" Sean said to lighten the mood. "It seems we got off on the wrong foot…" He paused and wondered if they would understand it. Silly foreigners!
The blond guy asked, "How do you have magic attacks? Some corpses have burns on them and–"
"Easy! Teammates upstairs…" he cut in, then decided there was no point pretending he had a much larger team – so he bluffed instead, "Kinda carrying a low-level friend, yeah."
"So your friend took the quest," the leader speculated. Sean merely nodded twice – no need to deny that theory. The guy accused, "That's cheating."
"Is it, though?" Sean argued. "I didn't see any rules about that!" He smiled… mostly to himself – it was true: he had never seen any rules for this place. They started discussing something in Swedish, and Sean worried it might be about attacking him. He figured it would be best not to let them dwell on the topic, so he broke in after a moment: "But she's very helpful: healed my leg and everything." He pointed at his torn pant leg as proof, then added, "Great teamwork – totally not cheating."
The Swedes exchanged a few sentences in their language and Sean understood none of it, but then the blond leader stated, "This is our farming spot. You should go find your own somewhere–"
"Do you have a property deed?" Sean cut in, suddenly irritated. "Like… have you bought this place, is that it? Or some kind of exclusive contract?" He paused and they glanced at each other nervously. Sean figured that if his bluff had gotten him this far… why not keep going: "Look, there's another way to resolve the dispute, but then the guards will crowd this place and sort us out ." He moved his hands to his waist, but didn't grab his axes just yet.
They weren't too eager to attack and just stared at him. Or maybe that was the Swedish custom before PVP? Who knew!
Sean decided to feign being reasonable and concede to their apparent land-grab. He said, "But you know what? Fine, have at it! We won't stand in your way – enjoy all the Gremlins in the courtyard." He turned to the stairs.
"We don't do that," their leader remarked.
"What?" Sean asked, confused. "But then– Wait, how is this your farming spot , then?"
"We clear houses of Gremlin, one by one. Smaller packs: four or five at a time, or six," explained the blond.
"Or nine," added the tank.
"But that was tough fight," the blond admitted. "A dozen in the back is way too much."
"There's even more of them now, like twenty-something…" Sean remarked and realized: if these five struggled against nine Gremlins and came across seven corpses piled on top of each other and one broken door. Not to mention seeing Sean alone in here… greeting them with axes drawn – they must've assumed he was up to no good! The misunderstanding came within a hair's breadth away from escalating.
He also quickly did the math: eleven kills so far would be a third of what he and Emma needed – assuming she also had to kill sixteen of those. Fighting five had already been very tough… almost suicidal, actually. He wasn't eager to try his luck again with another door or house: what if there were six next time, or nine… He and Emma wouldn't stand a chance against that – they'd get swarmed!
The Swedes discussed it in the meantime and their leader announced, "Alright, we'll check some other houses. But don't make a mess outside again – otherwise people will start noticing."
"Or clean your own mess…" the guy in leather armor commented from the back.
Sean nodded and said, "Sorry about that, but…" He hesitated for a moment, then offered, "Or we can clear the courtyard together? Use the back door as a bottleneck, gather in the room and lure the Gremlins in… carefully. You've got three casters – that should be enough firepower."
"Two casters and Cleric," one cloaked guy from the back clarified.
"So you stab in the back?" the tank accused.
Sean frowned and explained, "Look, we just want some XP and to finish the quest. That should be enough Gremlins and we'll be out of your hair, okay?" He hesitated for a second, then added, "That means we'll stop bothering–"
"We know what it means," the leader interrupted, and they discussed it in their language. At least they relaxed a bit and stopped giving Sean hostile stares.
He examined the hallway: it was pretty narrow… or maybe they could even set up shop at the top of the stairs? There wouldn't be anywhere to fall back, but higher ground might give them even more of an advantage – or maybe slow the Gremlins down somewhat. The creatures were quite vicious.
"Is your girlfriend a Healer then?" the blond asked, suddenly switching back to English.
"She's not my– But yes, she's a Healer," Sean answered.
"Are you sure about axes?" the guy pressed. "That is the strangest Warrior loadout we've seen."
"Don't worry about me," Sean remarked confidently, unwilling to disclose any information on his class or lvl – the less they knew, the better. He added, "But I should ask my not-girlfriend if she's okay with this plan – be right back." He turned around and hoped Emma had not heard that whole conversation… a safe bet considering her detachment from the game.
He almost ran into her at the base of the stairs – and she was not staring at her screen.
"Oh, so uh… were you listening?" he asked, surprised.
"Yeah, what's the fuss about?" she replied.
Sean looked back – the Swedes were arguing in the living room. He decided to whisper, just in case some heightened senses could pick up speech from this distance: "I may have overplayed my combat prowess to avoid them kicking us out of here. Or worse…"
"Uh-huh," Emma muttered – this time attentively, then added, "Why?"
"Because…" he started and glanced back again, "they looked like they were protective of this farming spot and, well, they assumed I was overleveling so… I guess I just didn't correct them." He shrugged, deciding to downplay his part in the misunderstanding. Starting with omitting the drawn axes.
She sighed and commented, "So much drama for a stupid video game."
"Reality-game, not video," he corrected.
"Whatever!"
Sean frowned but pleaded instead of arguing, "In any case, just play along with my story… don't say too much. Don't argue too much either…" He paused. Emma was already scrolling, so he added, "And maybe hide the phone for once, like we're proper players here."
She sneered at him for a moment, then stashed the phone and mocked, "Fine, but I'm not your f**king girlfriend."
"That's what I told them!" Sean reassured. "Twice! No idea why they assumed that…"